Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Dealing two egos of the self

Have you ever asked yourself, what is the source of your sudden anger and rage? Well, I am not assuming that you are bad tempered but sudden anger does not always associated with bad temper all the time. A very calm and quite person can be furious sometimes. Theoretically, any kind of deprived feelings is the cause of your being burst out.

Don't get bored already with these complex discussion style, I have got a story to tell.

Lucia's ego
You know Lucia?
She was up in arms very recently at her office and expressed it in a violent way. Some fragile office properties were even damaged with her rage and the Boss had no option but let her know that she deserves a walking paper.
But in the evening, with her boyfriend, Lucia was very different. His name is Michael. Lucia told Michael the whole story.
'Well, what happened?' Michael asked.
Lucia smiles, 'Nothing serious actually. You know Karl, the tall nut guy sit next to me?'
'He always find some faults with my work. Always telling me what to do. I could not take it anymore. I know very well, I understand my work better than him.'
'Sure you do honey'.
Lucia leans her head to Michael's shoulder... well, that's different story.
But Michael is the existence that satisfy Lucia's ego here.

Michael's view
Michael was thinking of something else when Lucia's head was resting upon his shoulder. He had a bad day too. On the train, couple of hippies teased him to fight and if it happened his face would not be in it's shape. Luckily, the next station came and some policemen got on. But Michael could not let go the bitter scenes out of his mind.
While Lucia was thinking that only Michael understands her, he was bit of annoyed thinking that, 'Why have you made such a mess today? I can't share my story in this situation!' He was feeling kind of deprived.

Is superiority feeling natural?
'Everybody thinks that he or she is right; others are wrong.'
The line is in quotation mark but it is not any outstanding quote to refer. It is a simple everyday experience that we all have more or less. Anyway, if you insist for reference, pick any book by Strauss or psychologist of cognitive discourses and you may find hundreds of case studies that support the sentence.

But there is always a contradiction within contradiction. Everybody in his or her own mind feel confused about the ongoing thoughts. Whatever the expression is, either bold or weak, in the depth of mind there is an unobedient self that always raise questions.

You are feeling inferior to that extent as you are expressing superiority. So natural feeling is not a static issue. Every feeling in the world is correlated with each other.

How can this be cured?
First of all, do you think it's a problem?
You have heard of anger management course, counseling for self control but how on earth getting rid of superiority feeling is possible? The answer will be, yes; but I will add, 'in a sense'.
Because defining the Grey line between exposure of self and superiority feeling is necessary. You have written an wonderful article and need to reach millions of people- that's alright. But thinking that what you have written is absolutely right and no one earth has the proper knowledge to criticize it- is not alright.
That's where the question of cure comes. There is way to get into your mind and make yourself aware of the root cause. All you need to prepare yourself for the change.

If you have any inquiries on this issue, I will be more than happy to answer. I will be available on: